I Am The Grinch

I don't talk much about my job. That is a lesson borne of a fair amount of blowback in prior blogging about my work. And I don't think I'll be changing my position on that now.

So, no discussion of my particular employment here. However, I will touch upon some of the human realities of my unspecified work.

In my particular line of work, one could say that my job is to keep particular people from realizing their dreams. There are people out there who see in particular circumstances an opportunity, whether just or not, to get something they didn't have before.

Sometimes their visions are reasonable, and in those cases my job doesn't impinge much upon them. But there are times when their ideas are beyond the realm of what is reasonable, and in those cases my job is to keep the desires of their heart from being fulfilled.

To them, I'm The Grinch.

Today, I did my job quite well. There was a person, a Who if you will, who was seeking a nice, big present under their tree. This Who was a perfectly nice person. This Who, in fact, deserved a present under their tree, just not a big one. Over the past year and a half, though, they worked their present up to something huge in their mind. And, today, reality gave them one heck of a hip check as The Grinch ripped their joy away.

It's odd. I derive some level of pleasure from my job, and at the same time I feel a bit dirty by it. In my line of work, in the system that I function in, The Grinch is necessary. In fact, The Grinch is healthy, and by-and-large is a force for good. That doesn't necessarily make me feel great about my Grinchiness.

I am The Grinch. It's who I am, it's what I do. Particularly in this season, who I am brings me a little bit of angst, even as I celebrate a job well done.